The Scariest Experience of my Life!

Poor little Nixon at 1 month old..

Entry written at the Hospital:

Saturday April. 3rd: 

Well what started out as a long week with Elias and Nixon being sick turned into a Nightmare on Friday the 3rd. Nixon had been quite sick for the past few days with a bad cough and stuffed up nose and after taking him to the doctor on Thursday and they said he just had a bad cold i assumed on Friday when he was really pale and wouldnt eat that he was just really sick and would soon get better. 

It wasnt until about 3:30 that day when i realized Nixon looked Very pale and his lips looked almost blue as he was sitting in his swing. I was really concerned and so i picked him up and held him for the next 1/2hr, when i realized he had turned really blue and gone completely limp like a rag doll. I started freaking out and checked his breathing.. nothing! I was trying everything to get some kind of reaction from him as i was yelling his name.. still nothing. He honestly looked dead and i thought he might be.. it was BEYOND SCARY!!! 

Just as i was going to call 911 I felt like i should stick my finger in his mouth and down his throat a bit since he had been choking on a lot of flem that day.. as i did this he kinda coughed and started breathing again, his color started to return a bit but he still looked sooo sick. 

I just started bawling my eyes out.. because honestly i just couldnt believe what had just happened and I had almost lost him- he had really seemed dead to me.

I then called Jeremy on his cell and he happened to be off early from school, which never happens and was almost home. When he arrived i gave him Nixon and he too thought he did not look good at all but thought maybe i had over reacted earlier. Then about another 10 minutes later as i was on the phone with the doctors office i looked down again and he was very limp, very blue and his eyes rolled back and he stopped breathing AGAIN!! I started screaming"he's not breathing" and gave Nixon to jeremy..he tried getting some reaction from Nixon and i could tell Jer was really scared too and then he began CPR on Nixon. Just as i was picking up the phone to call 911 again Nixon started breathing.. and his color started coming back.. I was freaking out sooo bad and we immediately when to the ER to see what was wrong.  

When we arrived his heart rate was really high and the nurses started doing tests on him. Jeremy decided to take Elias for dinner as i was waiting for the doctor to come. After about 10 minutes of waiting i noticed he was turning blue again and just as i was leaving the room to get help-  2 doctors walked in and when they saw Nixon they immediately looked worried and took Nixon from me and started hooking him up to IV's and oxygen and another 2 nurses rushed in to help as well. I was bawling my eyes out not knowing what was going on. Once they got Nixon hooked up to the oxygen and his heart rate went down they explained he was okay for now, but needed further tests to see what was going on. That was so scary and i hated be all alone. 

They then had to get x rays, which was such a horrible experience for poor little Nixon , he was screaming soo much and i felt so bad and so guilty. Then he needed a "spinal tap" to rule out meningitis (because his xray came back showing an infection in the lungs). They used those Huge needles like you get for an epideral.. they wouldn't let me stay with him either when they did it.. i felt so helpless. 

This ones my favorite.. he looks like he smiling at me.

Nixon was such a tough little guy..

Today (Saturday) we found out that Nixon has Pneumonia and RSV (a respiratory virus). He got RSV first, which was a viral infection in the nose, but because he is only 1 month and soo little he couldnt fight the infection and the infection travelled down into his lungs causing a bacterial infection called pneumonia. Man, poor little guy he has been through so much, hopefully tomorrow he will start getting better. 

Sunday the 4th: Well he went through the whole night breathing without oxygen and he is looking and acting ssoo much better now so we get to go home today.  YAY!!!

And as i look over at my beautiful baby boy lying in the hospital crib i cant help but feel 

so blessed  and so thankful. Its also very hard not to reflect on how close we came to losing him as well. Life is just so precious and i am sooo grateful to a loving Heavenly Father who i Know was watching over Nixon and protecting him. He is so special and i hope i never forget this experience despite how incredibly scary it was i hope i never forget how special my kids are and how much joy they bring into our lives.